Safe SCP Entities: An Unexpectedly Safe Guide to the Extraordinary

Arkane Curiosities

Step into the realm of the SCP Foundation, where the boundaries of reality quiver, and ordinary objects embrace the sublime. SCP stands for Secure, Contain, and Protect. This fictional organization tracks down and catalogs the strangest entities the universe has to offer — a vast collection of objects, creatures, and phenomena that defy the laws of nature as we know them. But not every entity is a danger. A peculiar subset of SCP entities known as “Safe” are just as they sound: less a threat than their more boisterous counterparts. Safe SCP entities are the equivalent of a tea cozy on a thermonuclear bomb or a bowtie on an unruly tornado – utterly peculiar, but remarkably benign.

More Object and Monster

Within this realm of Safe SCPs, the ordinary becomes extraordinary, and the mundane harbors secrets waiting to be discovered. Safe-class SCPs are easy to contain and are little threat to people, as a whole. Typically posing as inanimate objects, they are far from totally harmless. Listed below are some of the more notable Safe Entities. 

SCP-085: “Hand-drawn Cassy”, “Cassandra” or “Cassy”

This two-dimensional entity takes the form of a young girl, estimated to be around ten years old. She is a drawing, discovered in an abandoned house along with various other anomalous objects. Cassy’s abilities are confined to the surface of the paper she inhabits, but she can jump from paper to paper, provided they are touching. 

Interactions with Cassy are facilitated through written or spoken communication. She can read and respond to written messages and can also communicate verbally through a voice synthesizer. Due to her two-dimensional nature, Cassy is vulnerable to damage and destruction. Any harm inflicted on her drawing affects her directly, causing pain or even potential death. 

SCP-426: “I Am A Toaster”

This looks like a typical two-slice toaster, except it only refers to itself in the first person “I am a toaster”. It has the ability to alter the thoughts and self-perception of those who acknowledge its existence. Anyone who stays in its presence for two months will believe that they have become the toaster. Affected individuals genuinely perceive themselves as a toaster, complete with thoughts and emotions befitting an inanimate kitchen appliance.

Those affected will often produce toaster sounds resembling and express concerns related to their “toaster” condition. This includes anxieties about being used improperly, fear of being neglected or discarded, and a longing for toast-based sustenance. They may even attempt to engage in activities typical of a toaster, such as browning slices of bread or begging for crumbs.

SCP-294: “Coffee Machine”

This entity takes the form of an ordinary coffee vending machine, but its capabilities extend far beyond the realm of caffeinated beverages. Equipped with a QWERTY keypad, the machine can dispense and liquid typed in. While its main purpose is to offer beverages, it can also provide non-consumable liquids, such as acids or even more unusual substances like lava or venom.

One remarkable aspect of SCP-294 is its ability to fulfill requests for liquids that should not exist or are unobtainable through conventional means, such as antimatter or tachyons. However, there are limitations to its capabilities. SCP-294 cannot produce living organisms or substances that exceed its internal volume capacity. 

SCP-458: “The Never-Ending Pizza Box”

This entity looks exactly like a pizza box from Little Caesar’s (Hot-n-Ready). The instant human hands touch the box, it reads the holders mind, creating the perfect pizza down to the toppings, styles and even dietary restrictions.

The box’s capacity to provide pizza seems limitless, defying the bounds of conventional physics and culinary expectations. No matter how many slices are removed, SCP-458 magically replenishes itself, ensuring that those partaking in its offerings will never go hungry.

SCP-458 can only make pizza and its box is indestructible.

SCP-131: “Eye Pods”

These are a pair of adorable creatures resembling miniature eye-like entities. Each Eye Pod measures approximately 3 inches across with a rubbery outer layer that resembles an eye. They are mobile, possessing a wheel-like protrusion which allows them to move about.

The eye pods communicate with each other with an untranslatable high-pitched babbling. No one has ever observed these eyes blinking, even in laboratories while being videotaped for over 18 consecutive hours.

These entities require no care or feeding from the staff. They don’t even sleep. The only sustenance for these little fellows is visual stimulation. 

Safe Entities

The enigmatic nature of these “safe” entities continues to intrigue researchers within the Foundation. They strive to unravel the mysteries surrounding these extraordinary beings.

Tim Kane

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