Legolas - Tim Kane Books

Sure, as a fan of horror, everyone’s getting plastered. Yet turn to fantasy, sci-fi, or superheroes and debauchery is more limited. When I picked these scenes, I tried to choose ones that resonated with me. A scene of drunkenness that glued itself so hard to my brain, I could never wipe it clean (unlike most nights drinking). Where possible, I included a link to the YouTube clip of the scene. Just click on the picture.

1 Superman III

First let me say that I saw this movie nine times in the theater. I’m not saying it was a good movie. Only that I had a lot of spare time as a twelve-year-old with a bike. I think the writers were trying for a sort of Bizarro. Only in this version, Richard Pryor (playing computer genius Gus Gorman) tries to recreate kryptonite but one ingredient is unknown. Since it’s the 80s, he has a pack of cigarettes and enters “tar” as the final ingredient. When exposed to this tar kryptonite, it turns Supe nasty and evil (this the drinking binge).

2 Iron Man 2

I couldn’t find any pics of the best scenes, where Tony Stark is dancing with hotties or blasting water melons. Lets just say it’s what we expect most people would do with super powers.

3 Princess Bride

By far one of my most favorite movies. This scene takes some explaining (although if you haven’t seen the movie, stop everything and go and rent it now). Inigo, a famous swordsman, has failed to defeat the Man in Black, so he gets himself rip roaring drunk. The real fun begins when the local police, headed by his pal Fezzik come across him. Fezzik nourishes Inigo back to health by repeatedly dunking his head in water.

4 Lord of the Rings: Return of the King

I often replay the drinking game between Gimli and Legolas. The dwarf pounds beer after beer, while the elf only gets tingly in his fingers.

5 Star Trek (J. J. Abrams remake)

Why is this my first choice. Well, I wish I could have found a movie clip, but it’s such a great scene. Chris Pine (as James T. Kirk) simultaneously flirts with Uhura, insults some aggressive bar folk, and gets his butt kicked. Here’s how the lines went down:

Lt. Nyota Uhura: I’m impressed. For a moment there, I thought you were just a dumb hick who only has sex with farm animals.
James T. Kirk: Well, not only.
Burly Cadet #1: This townie isn’t bothering you, right?
Lt. Nyota Uhura: Oh, beyond belief, but it’s nothing I can’t handle.
James T. Kirk: You could handle me, if that’s an invitation.
Burly Cadet #1: Hey, you better mind your manners.
James T. Kirk: Oh relax, cupcake, it was a joke.
Burly Cadet #1: Hey, farm-boy, maybe you can’t count, but there are four of us and one of you.
James T. Kirk: So, get two more guys and then it’ll be an even fight.

What are your favorite drunken scenes from sci-fi, fantasy, or superhero movies? Comment below.

Tim Kane

In March we saw Katniss Everdeen skewer a pig in front of the game makers. Her archery abilities weren’t just a throwaway skill. The bow and arrow were the focal point of the novel. She hunted for game to support her family. Her high score in the Hunger Games made her a target. Likewise, she destroyed the careers’ food with a well placed shot.

Then there’s The Avengers. Joss Whedon skillfully built up Hawkeye’s character from nearly nothing to a character on par with the other heavies of the film. His trick? Make the archer the bad guy for most of the film. Then his skills are forefront for much of the screen time.

A month later we’ll have Pixar’s Brave, featuring a young maiden quite skilled with the bow. I can’t discern the plot yet, but her archery abilities seem to dominate the trailers.

Then, in December, we have the original super archer: Legolas. Okay, not the actual arrow-slinging elf, but The Hobbit will feature Legolas’s dad. Rumors abound the Orlando Bloom will cameo as Legolas. Perhaps firing a few arrows.